Tell us your story, how did you get into the industry and what has your journey looked like thus far?
I started stripping and nude modelling about 9 years ago, whilst recovering from a traumatic accident that almost left me paralyzed. I lost a lot of weight in the process and I was redeveloping a relationship with my new body. During this time, I realized I could never live the life I wanted to through the formal labor economy. I couldn’t commit to 9-5, balance work and leisure, and also have time to travel or create art.
After stripping all over the country (and in a few others), I started working in erotic massage and BDSM. Realizing that what I truly needed was to be my own boss, I quit stripping forever a few years back and started working as an escort and Dominatrix full time. Unfortunately for me, this was right before FOSTA/ SESTA passed and I was flown into sex worker organizing at the same time as I was building my career.
In fact, this timing had a silver lining, gracing me with the most loyal and fierce community I could ever ask for. I learned a larger variety of skills during my time as a sex worker than at any point in university. My intrinsic need to dedicate myself to the care of others has found its home here and I’m really excited to continue building relationships with my clients and other workers.
What are some of your hobbies and interests outside of work?
I’ve been doing pole and circus arts for many years, starting from when I worked as a stripper. I think in another life I’d be a full-time circus performer, traveling around the world and doing shows.
I also started doing burlesque around the same time I started pole dancing, which has inspired me to go back to school someday and get a degree in performance art.
During quarantine I started making rhinestone embellished leather harnesses which I'd like to start selling next year.
I saw that you're also an artist! How long have you been painting and who are some of your favorite artists?
I’ve been a painter for almost 18 years. I got an MFA in California and was planning on focusing on art full-time until the accident changed the trajectory of my life. I gave up painting whilst I traveled the world for almost 5 years. Now, in quarantine, it feels like the perfect time to really re-invest in my art practice.
I believe it was when I witnessed an installation by the late Félix González-Torres, that I was first moved to tears from a piece. He inspired me to expand my art practice beyond the canvas. During school, I was also heavily influenced by Mark Dion and the relationship between the process of taxonomy and ideology.
We know sex workers are experiencing censorship online, what have your experiences been with this?
I have the serendipity of starting my career in the US during a the time when people were offering a deluge of harm reduction and cyber security workshops. I went to an event hosted by Hacking/ hustling right as I moved to NYC and so my footprint on the internet is smaller than it would be if I had been advertising on Backpage for longer. I know how to use bitcoin so I’ve been able to avoid my bank account being shut down - like many of my friends who’ve been working longer.
Although I occasionally get shadow banned from Twitter, my personal experiences with censorship has been thankfully limited. I realize this is an incredible privilege so I try to put my efforts in helping other people stay safe and directing them to further resources.
As sex workers we face a number of challenges in our line of work. What is one issues you care about and how do you think you clients can help sex workers?
A lot of my interactions with the public consist of me promoting decriminalization and explaining how the End Demand model has been shown to increase the violence against vulnerable sex workers and can push them into further financially precarious positions. After the passage of FOSTA/ SESTA, police raids on massage parlors have increased exponentially, under the guise that they are “rescuing trafficking victims.” The formation of Red Canary Song, in response to the death of Yang Song in 2017 during a police raid, highlighted the xenophobia and hypocrisy of these supposed ‘anti-trafficking’ measures. Decriminalizing sex work and ending the institutional and police violence enacted upon migrants and sex workers, I believe, is one of our most pressing needs. That being said, lobbying for full decrim is only a small part of how one can help.
I tell many of my clients that they have a unique ability (due to financial and social privilege) to help protect our human rights. Voting for sex worker-friendly elected officials and funding our projects are some of the most important ways they can support.
I’m also active in organizations such as SWOP Brooklyn: they provide mini grants to NY sex workers in need, offer street outreach and connect people with resources. I’ve asked a lot of my clients to donate to our fund because it goes directly to local people in need and the impact is immediate.
Where do you think that stigma attached to sex work comes from?
I think that the stigma attached to sex work has been around for as long as the Patriarchy, and that one could use the level of such stigma as a barometer for gender equity within a society.
David Graeber wrote a really compelling account of the relationship between capital and women’s bodies in his book “Debt: The first 5000 years.” He discusses how it was “through the body of the women, that money transitioned from a measure of honor to a measure of what honor is not.” Within any culture that views a woman’s virginity as something highly prized, the importance of distinguishing between prostitutes and so-called ‘virtuous’ women becomes tantamount. And so, I think that for as long as women’s reproductive capacities are controlled by the state, their families, or by men, sex work outside of the institution of Marriage will remain taboo.
Are there any advocacy groups or charitable organisations that you'd like us to give a shout out to?
Ones that immediately come to mind are: Red Canary Song, SWOP Brooklyn, Green Light Project, G.L.I.T.S., and Lysistrata MCCF. But there’s really too many to count!
Do you have any tips for workers just starting out?
Find your community! Having other people who know the ropes is an invaluable resource. They will help you stay safe, offer community care, and technical tips. Despite the constant attacks on our online presence, sex worker spaces in the virtual world are still thriving. See if there is an organization or collective in your city or state. Virtually all my friends in NY are sex workers, a testament to their fierce loyalty.
My ideal date consists of: An afternoon of rock climbing in Tonsai, Thailand, followed by a romantic dinner on the beach and a night-time psychedelic swim among the glowing blue nebulae of bio-luminescent plankton. I lush after anything that will push me out of my comfort zone and get my heart racing.
I get a thrill out of: Adventure sports and the element of danger. Want to explore an abandoned psychiatric hospital in Europe or go caving in Indonesia? Count me in!
If you were to buy me a drink, you should order a: Aviation cocktail or anything with scotch in it
My favorite brand of lingerie is: I’m very partial to small independent brands. Right now I’m hoping to finally purchase a harness from lovechild boudoir.
My favorite tattoo artist is: Do I have to choose? Perhaps the one I am currently working with to finish my leg sleeve: Cody Eich.
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