Sex Work and Chronic Illness

Sex Work and Chronic Illness

. 5 min read

When people talk about disability and sex work, they often focus on disabled clients. While disabled clients are an important subject as well, right now I want to focus on disabled sex workers. Specifically, sex workers with chronic illnesses.

What Do We Know

Unfortunately, we don’t have a lot of information about disabled sex workers. However, as I wrote about in Rooted in Rights, a blog about disability, there is evidence that shows that sex workers are disproportionately disabled. There are several likely reasons for this, including lack of accessibility of non-criminalized jobs which leads some sex workers into sex work. That’s how I started, I started doing sex work after I became too sick with autoimmune illnesses to work as a lawyer.

Since I couldn’t find out much information on the connection between disability and sex work, I decided to do my own research. In order to do this I put a call out on my sex work Twitter for disabled sex workers to participate in a survey and seven people returned the survey. While they weren’t all chronically ill, the vast majority were. The information below is information that I learned from those surveys and from living as a chronically ill sex worker myself. While the answers came from all over the world, I am based in the U.S. and the U.S. was disproportionately represented by respondents.

What I found Out

So many of the people that replied had stories similar to mine in that they did sex work because their disabilities interfered with their ability to work other jobs. For example, one person said sex work “initially was a means to an end to help me with living and medical costs since I wasn’t finding work in civvie life that would sustain me long term with the flexibility I required.”

They make an important point about the importance of flexibility for sex workers with chronic illnesses. One chronically ill sex worker said she liked sex work because she is “in control of my own schedule, so if I am having a flare, I can cancel everything and take care of my body the way I need without needing to report to a boss or just power through. Working short periods allows me the financial freedom to do things that improve my quality of life, like investing in massages and CBD treatments.”

Both of these answers also make an important point which is that being chronically ill is expensive. Even if you live in a country that provides somewhat robust disability and healthcare benefits (this definitely does not include the U.S.), you’ll still have other expenses that nondisabled people don’t have whether it's co-pays, medications, other treatments, or the increased costs of special diets and convenience foods.

To Other Chronically Ill Sex Workers

If you are a chronically ill sex worker, and there are lots of us, it may be hard to balance the demands of our bodies and our jobs. I don’t have answers because I’m honestly not great at this, but here are some things that I have learned and try to incorporate (with mixed results).

Prioritize myself - Self-care is always important for sex workers, but it’s especially important for sex workers with chronic illnesses. For a lot of us all it takes is a bad night of sleep or too much exertion and we can end up in a flare, where we feel extra sick for an extended period of time. Because of this, I have put certain boundaries in place that may mean I lose out on money, but in the end it helps make this work sustainable. One example is that I don’t do overnights, or even dates longer than three hours because I get too tired. While I would love to be able to take longer dates, in the end the damage it would do to my body wouldn’t be worth it.

Don’t feel guilty about disclosing or not illnesses or not to clients – Obviously clients aren’t owed any of our personal health information and it’s okay not to disclose things. However, I have found that disclosing to my clients has actually been helpful and for the most part they are very supportive and it makes it easier to assert my needs for things like breaks or changes in position. As always, trust your gut.

Don’t feel guilty for flares – If you have chronic illnesses, there will likely be times that they flare up and you will need to take time off if you are able. I used to feel guilty whenever I have to cancel or reschedule appointments or take time off because my body was in extra pain or my joints were too swollen. But I realized this is the same body that also brings pleasure to people and to myself and by taking the time I need I am honoring it. (Of course this is easier said than done, and I am still working on this.)

To People Who Want to Support Us

If you are a healthy person and want to help support disabled and chronically ill sex workers, there are things that you can do! First of all, anything that helps us financially is helpful whether that is giving us money directly or helping us with promo.If you’re a sex worker you can help out through asking us for duos and other jobs, etc. I and a lot of other chronically ill sex workers had to or still are unable to work due to being high risk for COVID-19, so it’s an especially important time to help support us.

Besides money, it’s important for healthy sex workers to understand that not everyone has a body that works like theirs and just because they can do something then everyone can. Sometimes sex workers have expectations or assumptions about each other that are not always accurate. For example, because of my illness flares I don’t have an Onlyfans of similar account since I can’t consistently make and put out content (not to mention that my kids are home all the time), yet no matter how often I explain this, people keep suggesting it to me as a way to make money when it’s just not accessible to me.

Which bring me to my final and most important point: Listen to us. If you know a disabled or sick sex worker check in with us and ask what we need. Especially if you can offer actual material support! (Even something as simple as a retweet can make a difference) But we know our needs best and it’s important that sick and disabled sex workers are centered in the sex worker movement.


Are you a sex worker with a story, opinion, news or tips to share? We'd love to hear from you!

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