The height of the pandemic gave us many things and for me it was a very belated and very necessary autism diagnosis. Finally accepting and understanding my neurodivergence helped me begin to slowly unmask, and the extended solitude of early lockdowns allowed my true self to peek through.
I used our mandatory one hour daily outdoor exercise to visit a local nature spot every day and as I slowly unfurled the petals of my autistic self a new love began to bloom: birds.
The nature spot was replete with wild water birds, geese, swans, and cormorants. I became utterly obsessed with watching their daily rhythms. Their cute and somewhat chaotic lives had me hooked. I decided to see if I could ‘tame’ a goose as a little challenge – hey, we all had weird hobbies during that period.
I chose a chatty Egyptian Goose who I named Loaf, feeding him and his mated partner daily. I got to the point where they would happily sit with me in the shade of the trees in that uncharacteristically warm and clear spring.
As I slowly unfurled the petals of my autistic self a new love began to bloom: birds.
I was rewarded in late May 2020. One day as I entered the beauty spot, Loaf came charging towards me honking madly, as if trying to lead me somewhere. I followed this funny little creature to the reeds and was greeted with the sight of 6 ping pong ball sized pieces of fluff: Loaf and his partner proudly showing me their first clutch of babies together.
That was the moment the bird bug truly bit me and I couldn't imagine how I'd gone 28 years not knowing my biggest and most cherished Special Interest.
I spent 2021 devising ways to add more birds to my life. They gave me such unbridled joy in a very uncertain world, and I decided I'd take the leap into bird ‘ownership’.
London is famous for its wild green parrots, who I would often feed in St James's park. After research I discovered this breed was called an Indian Ringneck and they were possible, but sadly very difficult, to keep at pets.
I decided to start small, found a wonderful, ethical breeder of parrots, and welcomed home two Australian Budgies, Atlas and Luna.
My life was transformed as I adjusted my daily routine to accommodate these tiny, tenacious, yet comical little creatures. I spent hours hand taming and training them, and was utterly in love.
In September 2021 fate struck. Out of the blue my breeder contacted me and said she had an Indian Ringneck with no home to go to, would I consider? I was fully aware, much like with dogs, that once you welcome a bigger parrot into your home your life has to revolve around them. Was I ready? Could I give this little creature a great life?
I took the leap.
They gave me such unbridled joy in a very uncertain world, and I decided I'd take the leap into bird ‘ownership’.
Four weeks later I had a noisy, funny little green parrot careering round my house. I won't sugar coat the experience, raising birds is difficult. They require infinite patience, time and dedication. My parent friends even commented on how similar their behaviour is to their own human toddlers. But I have never known love like it.
Sex Work has allowed me to dedicate a larger chunk of my time to raising my ‘children’. They love to learn tricks and words. My biggest parrot can now identify five colours, count to four and identify every letter of the alphabet. Research shows parrots have a level of intelligence akin to a human 3 year old. They are desperate to learn and grow with you, which makes them one of the most engaging life partners you can get.
Beyond my home menagerie, I'm still the local ‘crazy bird lady’. I've built my balcony to be a refuge for our local bird populations of jackdaws, magpies, little birds and the occasional feral ringneck Parrot.
When we moved to Amsterdam my first activity, mentioned to me by a dear sex work comrade and friend, was Queer Bird Club. Once a month a rag tag diverse group of Queers meet in Amsterdam’s parks and wetlands to watch birds together, and this is where I met many of my closest Dutch friends.
As a hobby it gives endlessly and generously and I'm so grateful for those lockdown walks for introducing me to what has been a life-changing love.
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