You’re keen to support sex workers, right now, but how do you get started?
This is a blog for all my favourite clients, the ones that care about me and the other workers they spend time with. It’s also for the people in my personal life, and for the folks who care about sex worker rights simply because they know it’s the right thing to do.
Caring is hard, especially when it comes to the big issues. Sex worker rights are human rights, and solving the far-reaching problems associated with sex work stigma and discrimination can often feel both complex and overwhelming. You’re just one person, right? What can you do? But if you feel strongly about this, and want to help make things better, the good news is, as with many kinds of activism, it really isn’t about needing to have all the solutions. It’s just one step at a time, and that makes a difference.
Taking action does work!
I want to show you that contributing to the fight does make a difference. Even if you’re not a sex worker yourself, there’s a lot you can do. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that the participation of our allies is often essential.
In March this year, a collective of strippers in New Zealand protested unfair treatment by the club that employed them. Over 7000 people signed a petition calling for the right of strippers to bargain collectively while remaining independent contractors, an end to unfair shift fees and fines, and a cap on the percentage of fees that an establishment can take from workers. The activist group, Fired Up Stilettos, were then invited to speak in New Zealand Parliament.
Bringing this campaign into the public consciousness was instrumental to its success. In an article for Tryst.link, Vixen Temple writes: “When walking through the streets of Wellington, I overhear conversations from civilians saying, ‘Did you hear about what happened at Calendar Girls?’ I see posters throughout the city talking about Fired Up Stilettos. I am seeing the significant impact this movement has had.” Getting members of the public involved helped lend political weight to the issue, ensuring the workers were heard by the government.
Sometimes it really is as simple as being part of the conversation. But what does it mean to be a good sex work ally? What are the specific steps and actions you can take? Here are three starting points.
Listen to sex workers
What does it mean to really understand sex workers and their needs? The first step is to listen. Until you learn about the issues, you won’t know what you’re fighting for, and you risk getting it wrong and potentially spreading misinformation.
Listening means searching out useful information. As you absorb the experiences and ideas of workers, you’ll begin to understand the logic behind ideas such as ‘sex work is work’ and why full decriminalisation of sex work is essential. It can be very interesting to explore what life is like for providers!
A few sources to consider:
- Read the Tryst.link blog and the Good Client Guide
- Read ezines such as PetitMort and Tits and Sass
- Follow sex work activists on social media
- Check out the websites of peer organisations in your area such as SWOP USA, Scarlet Alliance (Australia), or New Zealand Prostitute’s Collective (NZPC).
- Read some books about sex work politics! Here are my favourites.
As you listen and learn, be critical. Is your source an actual sex worker? Is the website or book you’re reading funded by an anti-sex-work group, or is it produced by a peer-run organisation? Remember, nobody speaks for everybody else, and personal stories from workers don’t necessarily represent everyone’s experience. It’s especially important to look for diverse range of voices: trans workers, migrant workers, and people who do all kinds of different sex work, so that you’re getting a range of views.
Speak up, intervene, campaign
Advocacy – especially in public spaces –is such a crucial step. Until the world at large sees sex work as just another kind of job, it will be very difficult for us to improve our working conditions or change how we’re treated in and out of our communities. One of the most powerful things you can do as an ally is spread the word that sex work is work.
What you can do will depend on your situation and how ‘out’ you are. It might mean speaking up in your social groups and refuting bad takes or shutting down mean jokes about providers. Talk about sex work as though it’s an everyday thing; it is! If you can, talk about being an ally — when it’s appropriate. Try saying, “I’m not an expert in sex work, but you might want to consider…”
If you can’t speak up in your in-person social groups, you might still be able to fight back against bad information on social media. When you see people trash talking workers, use reasonable arguments to help educate the original poster (and anyone reading those posts) on sex worker rights.
Make sure you’re advocating and not just shouting someone down. It can feel satisfying to ‘flex’ by showing you’re in the know about the sex industry, but a calm and compassionate approach is more effective. Sex workers don’t always have the time or energy for those patient conversations, so we appreciate it when well-informed allies do some of the work!
Here are a few other ways to advocate:
- Watch out for issues that affect sex workers but aren’t obviously targeted at us, such as online censorship bills. If harmful laws are being considered, contact your local lawmakers to spell out your objections.
- Follow workers and peer organisations on social media to find out about the latest actions and petitions.
- Share and amplify the voices of sex work activists. Recommend interesting books on sex work to your friends. Post the links to insightful sex-worker-written articles on your social feeds. Spread that education around!
Above all, refuse to be ashamed! Sex workers such as myself have learned to be matter-of-fact about this work, and about sex in general, and you can too.
Donate
Perhaps you’re not a debater or a keen reader. Perhaps you feel as though you don’t have much to offer around speaking up, and you feel a bit ‘out of the loop’ when it comes to the latest happenings in our world. Well, there’s still a lot you can do.
Often, lack of funds really is the thing that brings all our activism efforts to a standstill. Putting together campaigns, getting the attention of the press, and swooping in to help marginalised workers when they really need it – all this comes with a price tag.
There are quite a few programs and funds that help workers, but they’re usually desperately under-funded. Many programs run by peer organisations – such as SWOP Behind Bars and Red Canary Song – rely on the generosity of both fellow workers and our allies to keep running. If you have the means, even a small, regular donation can help boost these essential services.
A few tips for giving:
- Foster your local orgs over a long time, not a one-off. Set up a recurring donation if you can!
- Make sure you send your money to peer-run services and orgs, not government health programs or religious-run groups.
- Share donation campaigns with friends and on social media, if possible.
Funding is such an amazing gift to give. Imagine some small group of workers, meeting once a week in someone’s apartment to talk about how they can help, but struggling to find the money to actually get things done. Many of these activists are giving up their paid work time and taking a hit to their own income and ability to make a living in service of their community.
Now, imagine how great these people will feel when your donation arrives? You have an amazing power to make things better, and it’s something you can do right away.
Action, not opinion, is the basis for being a good ally.
I have a friend who says, “If you care about something and you act to change it, you’re an activist.” So I’d like to invite you to own that title. Wear it proudly, knowing that you’re done something immediate and direct to make life better for sex workers.
Everything you do – right now – not only helps us to advance our rights, but also encourages others to join the fight too.
Are you a sex worker with a story, opinion, news, or tips to share? We'd love to hear from you!
We started the tryst.link sex worker blog to help amplify those who aren't handed the mic and bring attention to the issues ya'll care about the most. Got a tale to tell? 👇☂️✨
