Hello, and welcome back to our provider interview series 'A Tryst With...' We're so happy to have you! Today we're catching up with Melbourne Escort Maxine.
How did you get into the industry and what does your journey look like so far?
In 2018 I had just graduated from university, with a masters under my belt, feeling like my career was set for life. This feeling was short-lived. I became unmotivated and unwilling to pursue what I had worked so hard for in six years. Canberra is a playground for lifetime professional careers in the public service, elite administration roles, all the way up to parliament positions. After a few attempts to follow the mainstream lead of getting a ‘normal job’, on a whim I decided to sign myself up to a sugar baby website. Suddenly, the same public servants, high paying administrators, and politicians were all asking me to work for them. I could hardly believe my luck! Beforehand, I had been blissfully ignorant of the sex industry, and I think this was probably the best way for me to integrate into a healthy relationship with my work, my personal life, and (FINALLY) financial independence!
Equally on a whim, I decided to move to Melbourne to try somewhere different. Here, I decided that I would try out-call escorting a go. And I thrived! I made some obvious baby sex working mistakes that I cringe about now, but I knew that I was good at my job. Just when I was starting to embrace being a sex worker and being proud of what I was doing, the pandemic hit. Lockdowns, curfews, isolation, and deep depression. We can all agree that the pandemic hit us hard, and sex workers were no exception to that.
Once Melbourne washed its hands of lockdowns, I started back up in the industry, but approaching it differently. I didn’t want to be traveling around for hours and going into a strangers house, so I settled on brothel work.
We can all agree that the pandemic hit us hard, and sex workers were no exception to that.
What was something you didn't expect going into the industry?
I never expected clients to intrude on personal boundaries. It surprises me every time and I don't think I will ever get used to it. Call me old fashioned, but I like to ask my partner if it’s okay to touch or do certain sexual acts. I cannot count the number of times I have had to tell a client no, only for them to continue to try and do the same thing over and over.
I also did not expect to become emotionally invested in my work. I’m deeply invested in educational and promotional ways, on platforms like this, but also in my clients. I am lucky enough to have a few clients who I look forward to seeing and to catch up on their lives like we are friends catching up for coffee, except we just happen to be naked.
My emotional investments have driven me into advocating on a low scale. I have been on several podcasts respectfully discussing my sex work which I have loved partaking in, and I now chose to put some of my story on this amazing platform in the hopes that together we can build each other up.
What do you think about the way sex workers are viewed in society?
I grew up on the poverty line for almost all of my life. It wasn’t until I had graduated from university and attempted to get a ‘normal job’ that I broke through financial barriers. Once I started sex work, I discovered financial freedom. This gets overlooked in society – sex work can be a means to an end, a side hustle, or a full-time job. I find assumptions are usually made when talking about how and why we do what we do. Financial independence is a core reason for doing any job, and I find that because society doesn’t view sex work as a ‘traditional’ job it gets overshadowed because of assumptions made about sex workers.
Sex workers are also seen as damaged in stereotypical and obscure ways. Our stereotype tells a story of a damaged girl needing saving from her environment, with daddy issues, probably abused as a child, and needs to escape her demons. The more obscure ways that society views sex workers are that we are expendable. I see this often in ways that clients will speak at us, not to us – as if we aren’t worth a please or a thank you. These small acts of indifference towards us scream volumes on how society has shaped views on sex workers and how we are treated – anything goes, because in that space we don’t matter to them.
These small acts of indifference towards us scream volumes on how society has shaped views on sex workers
Are you out as a sex worker and if so what was that process like?
My process was very slow. I was very sensitive to the stigma that surrounds sex work. I was very uncomfortable telling anyone. Once I moved to Melbourne, I slowly started to come out to my new friends – first lying and saying I was a stripper, and then finally coming clean and saying I was an escort. Fast forward a few years and I am unapologetic and confident about being a sex worker. My confidence today is a testament to how supportive my friends and partner are. I am lucky enough to have friends that see me as a person and then a sex worker, as well as a partner who supports me every day.
However, I have not come entirely clean to my family. I have told a half-truth – that I am a stripper. I am a firm believer in choosing my battles, and this is one such battle I choose to fight strategically.
What is one of your favourite sex work memories?
I am torn answering this question – I do have many fond memories with clients who I share a bond with. However, my favourite memories are with my fellow workers. A few months back, the unofficial recession had started in Melbourne and work was the quietest we had ever seen it. Some of the workers brought games to play while we were waiting for clients to come in. We played Uno, Snap, Cards Against Humanity, the works! A group of us cry-laughing, trying not to ruin our make-up, making each other cups of tea and coffee, and thriving in each other's company. It was worth coming into work and making almost no money for those memories alone.
For me, this is a big part of the reason I continue to do sex work – to have giggles with people I never would have met any other way and have bonded with in ways I can’t with non-sex workers. When I do retire from sex work, I will cherish these memories the most.
What is your favorite part of sex work culture?
So many things! I have made some amazing friends in the sex work community. There is nothing quite like seeing your gal pals when you come into work and catching up, and seeing their faces light up when they know they’ve bagged a good booking. I have found sex workers to be the most supportive and loving people.
I am fortunate enough to work in a brothel where we are each other's personal cheerleaders, a shoulder to take a nap on, unprofessional makeup artists, fashion advisers, and life coaches. And we have the most amazing house mums. Their priorities are the health and safety of all workers, and to make us as much money as possible. When I come into work it feels like we are a dynamic team of girl bosses who can make even the quietest of nights energetic and full of life and love.
I have found sex workers to be the most supportive and loving people.
What do you think the public should know about the sex industry?
The sex industry is one of the longest standing professions, so before passing judgment on the industry and its hard workers, the public should know about the complex impact we can have on people's sexual, emotional, and intimate lives. Sure, there is a standard service of a rub and tug here and there, but it can go deeper than that – no pun intended. But who knows how deep and meaningful a rub and tug might be for someone?
I think the public could learn a lot about sex workers and how we have positive impacts on clients. We are gifted improvisers, resourceful in ways I never knew possible, we have mastered the art of conversations, we are the unlicensed therapists, and sensitive to people's needs – whether that be sexual, intimate, or emotional. The sex industry has an important role for people to explore avenues of their sexuality, sexual desires, fantasies they are too fearful to try with a partner, or even losing their virginity with the security that we have experience with their physical and emotional needs. The industry and its workers deserve to have these qualities acknowledged and respected. We play a vital role – otherwise clients would never come back to us for more.
I think the public could learn a lot about sex workers and how we have positive impacts on clients. We are gifted improvisers, resourceful in ways I never knew possible.
What would you say to someone considering going into the industry?
I would give them my phone number straight away and tell them to contact me day or night if they have questions or concerns. You can never have enough buddies in the industry!
I would also tell them that they need to research which space they want to work in (stripping, outcall escorting, massage parlours, or brothel work). I would suggest they choose their battles wisely in terms of any extras they do or don’t provide, make sure they feel safe at all times, and to make sure they are well researched on what their expectations are at work.
I would also suggest buddying up with a fellow worker. I wish someone had shown me the ropes when I first started, so I would want any baby sex worker to have a friend in their place of work they can confide in, share a cup of tea with between bookings, or to help them choose their outfit for the shift.
Importantly, I would tell them to establish their boundaries before bookings, and stick to your guns like your life depends on it, because it might. Lastly, I would tell them that they should only do it if it makes them happy. Once you stop enjoying it, it’s time to move on. I realize not everyone has the luxury of opting out of the industry, or it’s an option they can’t afford. In some cases, once you’re in it can be impossible to get out and go straight. In this case I encourage to you to reach out to sex work advocacy programs and allies that provide emotional, financial, or physical care and support. Even if that doesn’t apply to you, there are safe places to come together and connect with other sex workers and allies. Talk to your fellow sex workers, and take care of one another - we are in this together.
Were there any folks in the industry you found helpful or interesting to follow on social media when you first started?
Oh my god, so many! It first started with Exotic Cancer on Instagram, and then I researched Scarlett Alliance, Vixen, and the Slut Walk Melbourne events. I briefly volunteered at Rhed before lockdowns and think their work is amazing for street-based workers.
I recently also discovered a new shop in Collingwood called Harlot which sells sex worker must-haves!
Is there a book, blog, tv show, or movie that has had a major impact on your life? What was it and what did it teach you?
So so so many! I have recently been devouring sex worker autobiographies, all of which are amazing reads:
Come – Rita Therese
Modern Whore – Andrea Werhun
Money for Something – Mia Walsch
Strong Female Character – Fern Brady
And a very honourable mention to Happy Endings to the late Bella Green – may she rest in peace.
All these women are inspiring in immeasurable ways. These books motivated me to become more aware of falsehoods around sex work and the industry. These phenomenal women show amazing insight into what it means to be a complex human being and a sex worker. We are portrayed as beautiful, fulfilled, multidimensional people who chose sex work for complex reasons, it highlights how social stigmas hurt us emotionally, physically, and financially. They give beautiful insights into how liberated we can be doing all kinds of sex work, and in all of its glory.
They also show the dark side of sex work – sexual harassment, depression, substance abuse, and self-harm. While I don’t think that these dark entities exist exclusively in sex workers, I do believe that it is important to create safe platforms to talk to each other about these things, and that’s exactly what these books do. Even after being in the industry for over 4 years, I learnt so much and was so inspired by these beautiful women. I think everyone, sex worker or non-sex worker should read these books.
Do you play music during your work? What are your top 4 playlists, artists, or albums for setting the mood during sessions?
I always play music during my bookings! In my first booking I didn’t think to bring my speaker, and “Cotton Eye Joe” by Rednex was playing on the radio. It did distract me from how nervous I was and I definitely had a little giggle to myself, but I learnt my lesson that night – music is key.
I have created a playlist exclusively for work purposes. There is a very big range of genres in there and I am always on the hunt for new songs.
My most heavily featured artists are Alt-J, Billie Eilish, Two Feet, Gorillaz, Ashnikko, Ghostemane, Doja Cat, Måneskin, She Wants Revenge, Corpse Husband, and Lil Mariko.
They’re all a combination of heavy bass, cheeky lyrics, sexual innuendos, and a rhythm I can keep up with, if you know what I mean.
In the future, I plan to… Write my own sex worker autobiography, retire early, marry my partner, buy a piece of land together, have a house with a giant library, drink tea, nap all day, have many pets, and always have a book in my hands.
My favorite lingerie brand is… A local Melbournian makes the most divine bikini/workwear: Cordite n Dynamite Bikinis. They’re a must-have for any sex worker!
My ultimate weakness is… Thinking about getting home after a long shift, freshly showered in bed, cup of tea in hand, and my cat sleeping on my tummy.
I get a big thrill out of… Doing reverse psychology on clients and non-sex workers. If you ask me an inappropriate question , I will flip it back and make them question themselves. Sometimes, some people need to be put in their place, right?
The secret to getting to know me is… I have a chronic sweet tooth. Please feel free to shower me with gifts of chocolate and lollies!
My dream vacation is… My Japanese holiday in February! Hurry up 2024!!!
One sex tip I think everyone should know is… People are not mind readers. Ask your partner things, listen, communicate, and let things happen organically. If you listen, you learn.
Want to meet Melbourne escort Maxine in person?
Head over to her profile! 👇👇👇
