Welcome to our sex worker interview series 'A Tryst With'. This time we're chatting with Logan escort Hue Belladonna about beauty in transness, neurodivergence, and unsolicited advice!
What has your path looked like on your journey to where you are now in sex work?
I started out doing street-based work back in 2017. I had a small community of whores who didn’t really know what we were doing or that there was any kind of sex worker rights movement but we worked together. I explored online work for a bit after that, and honestly my relationship with my work didn’t start out great. I had a lot of internalized whorephobia and I wasn’t as authentic to myself, nor did I have a great self care routine. During 2020 that started to change. I was learning about some historical whores in a human sexuality class. Having an introduction to a positive portrayal of sex workers and doing more self education got me involved in sex worker rights. In the last few years I’ve gotten to a point where I know this is work I want to continue in some form throughout my life. I’m a very out and proud whore, but it took me a while to find where I fit best in sex work. I expect as I explore new areas of the industry that it will change too. I’ve been mostly escorting and making content the last couple years, but I’ve been working towards learning to incorporate BDSM more into my work, and I am starting to connect with porn studios. I have also been considering training to do sex work in the realm of surrogate partner therapy, as well as exploring other areas of the industry as opportunity arises. So while I’m very content with my current work, I’m excited to see what new places this industry takes me.
Can you tell us some benefits and drawbacks of the sex industry?
As for benefits, I love the community I’ve had in the sex worker community, despite mostly working independently over the years. There’s so many queer folk here and there’s just a level of support and understanding I don’t find around civvies with similar intersections to mine. This industry has provided me a space that’s hard to find elsewhere as a queer, neurodivergent, disabled foreigner. I’ve also taken home so many skills from doing this work both professionally (from the day to day admin) and interpersonally (from working on such an intimate level with people). I love how flexible of a schedule the work gives me with my disabilities and my millions of projects I’m always working on. Getting to create content has been fun, but I love the personal connections I get to create in escorting that’s not always as present with my online fans. As for drawbacks, living somewhere sex work is criminalized definitely makes my work harder. A lot of the drawbacks I run into come more from external sources like misinformation about the industry than from the industry itself. I also learned recently that there are a lot of sex therapists that want to collaborate with sex workers and I wish that were more doable in the U.S. I think there’s a lot of room for progress and growth in the industry, especially in addressing intersectionality and structures like whorearchy. Overall though, the main drawbacks are from legislation and whorephobia.
What has sex work taught you about yourself?
Sex work has taught me that there’s beauty in my transness, my quirkiness, in myself. It’s helped me find ways to explore my masculinity and gender in ways that are attractive to me, letting go of the idea I grew up with that masculinity had to equal unattractive. It’s taught me the importance of my boundaries and how to be firm in them as well as so much about how I experience my sexuality and my gender and myself.
What's one stereotype that you wish clients knew the reality of?
As a sex worker who identifies as both trans and goth I feel like there’s this scripted idea on how to present as such. While I consider both a constant aspect of my identity, they’re not something I present in traditional ways. Hue is this goth femboy, but some days he’s gonna present more femme and some days more masc, and I often see clients come in with preconceived notions on what I like, dislike, and how I’ll present because of my gender. I like to tell people that there is nothing about sex or clothing or my body that is particularly feminine or masculine to me. Instead it’s about what feels euphoric in the moment and more about what we both like and dislike. Similarly, while I don’t come to every session or present in every piece of content in the gothic style I love, you’ll find it sleeping through in my interests and my little quirks.
Has there been a moment you’ve had where you felt really included in the sex work community? How have you been welcomed or supported by your sex industry peers?
I joined a virtual support group of current and former sex workers in the last year, which (being in a very isolated town in Utah where the community is smaller) has been a huge support for me. Over the summer I went to a conference for sex therapists and sexuality educators and was surprised to find so many other sex workers from a variety of professions and backgrounds. That was probably the most connected to community I’d felt in a long time. This community has mostly been very welcoming and felt more homey than even some communities related to other intersections I hold.
What kind of clients do you really enjoy working with? What are they looking for?
I’ve gotten to work with a variety of people over the years across a lot of demographics, which I love. For a lot of my clients I’m the first trans person, and first boy they’ve had a sexual encounter with. Whether they are exploring their sexuality, queerness, or gender for the first time, or they have known for years, I love getting to be a part of an individual's self exploration journey. I think a lot of people with the cultural and gendered norms we have around sex (and the poor sex education here in the US) are denied the spaces and experiences to explore their sexuality in ways that are most authentic and enjoyable for them. I really love creating that space and even beyond queerness I love working with clients who have a kink or something they want to try or talk about that they haven’t had the space to otherwise. I also really enjoy working with clients who are trying to heal trauma. While I don’t offer anything close to therapy, I do approach my work in trauma-informed ways and love creating that space both as a survivor and someone who has navigated religious trauma. One of my clients recently noted that my ad is true when I say I tend to start the session more shy and soft spoken and shift to this flirty tease. I really value more authentic connections with my clients. Based on my regulars, and the clients I’ve worked with overall, the clients who get the most from my sessions are those who show up with some idea of what they’d like to do that they feel comfortable vocalizing (whether that’s a detailed email of a fantasy before we even meet, or after a bit of chatting and cuddling they feel safe enough to talk about it). As well, I have so many fun and interesting and friendly conversations during my sessions, from digging into deeper topics to playfully sharing embarrassing sex stories. Conversation and connection is a big part of my work.
You make content! How do you balance making work that is both marketable and authentic to you?
Authenticity tends to be more important to me than marketability. When I started making content, I wanted to focus on learning to enjoy the process rather than focus on monetary gain. It’s also an introduction of me to my clients, so making my page accessible and representative of me was key. Making content has gotten me to try and think outside the box in coming up with new content ideas, while also getting familiar with my audience and which of my content tends to get more engagement. I make a lot of custom content and have a few fans who I know well because of how much niche content I make for them. But when it comes to what I post on my page, I want it to be very me, especially since I know some of my clients check out my content before booking me and I want it to represent me better for when we meet. When someone first looks at my page, they will find I regularly put out free content that tends to be the most authentic representation of me, and it isn’t always content that would be considered traditionally marketable. I consider marketability more for the priced content, but a big portion of what I do is custom content, dick ratings, and sexting. I try to focus my page on building more online connections, making a collection of gorgeous content of myself, and creating a conversation starter for someone who wants to approach me.
You’re a non-binary trans worker. What's it like for you navigating sex work and sex work spaces?
I spent the first six years in the industry presenting as a ciswoman in my work. I knew I was trans during that time – not quite nonbinary or transmasc though, since I hadn’t put a label on it yet. Sex work is easiest to navigate as a woman and so the decision to come out in my work was a tough one. There was always this underlying fear before that I would say or do or present in a way that would give it away when I wasn’t safe to be out. I definitely feel like this industry has been more difficult to navigate as an openly trans and nonbinary sex worker, but also the clients I see now are generally either curious, allies, or otherwise supportive. It also has allowed me to be more authentic with my clients and not have to worry about my gender or how I present during sessions. A lot of sex work spaces have been very open and allied. I do often get misgendered though, due to me both being very femme-presenting and also because a lot of those spaces are predominantly women, both cis and trans. I also run into clients who hear “trans” and immediately assume I’m a transwoman. Finding ways to advertise in ways that highlight my masculinity is something that has been more tricky for me. Seeing all the other transmasc and nonbinary providers on Tryst has helped me see the marketability of myself as a trans nonbinary person and improved my relationship with my gender. I plan to medically transition down the road and know my work will be drastically different when I do, but I already navigated a shift in what my clients and audience looked like when I decided to come out in my work, and am feeling more prepared for that change.
Has your work impacted your relationship with your gender and or your presentation? Has your gender expression changed since you started sex work?
My shift in understanding my gender as I do now had little to do with my work, but the way I present and perceive masculinity and femininity has definitely shifted because of sex work. Sex work has given me a variety of ways to experiment with and question gender, gender roles, and gender presentation. When I started this work I was almost hyper-feminine, in a more boldly goth way. Now I express myself differently on a day to day basis with a more androgynous look.
What’s it like being neurodivergent and a sex worker? Can you tell us about some of the positives and negatives?
I feel like my neurodivergence just adds quirks to myself that often turn into playful parts of how I show up to work. Like if I start infodumping on a client, or go on wild tangents in conversation, or I have some tics and stims that can be comical when they’re not endearing. I do feel like sex work has been the most adaptable job for my neurodivergence, but sometimes my neurodivergence can hinder my interactions with people. I take everything literally. I’m not the best with social cues. It’s great when I see neurodivergent clients who share some of the same struggles, but it gets trickier around neurotypical clients. Masking gets draining for me, though I consider myself good at it.
Being ND, how have you had to hack the system to make sex work more workable for you?
A lot of it has been learning when to mask, and when I don’t mask, knowing how to let my neurodivergent traits be present in ways that are playful and fit Hue’s character. Being neurodivergent is a part of me that is very intrinsic to my identity, but the same survival strategies I use in a neurotypical world fit here as well. The perk is that sex work allows me to use those strategies for shorter periods, but I’ve had to learn what’s manageable for me to avoid burnout and that sometimes that just might mean I’m not as available as I could otherwise be.
What are some of your ‘special interests’? Do you have any hobbies and passions you’d like to share?
My primary special interest is human sexuality (one of the many reasons I enjoy working in the industry). Many of my hyperfixations have shifted within it from kink to queerness, sex work history to sex ed, insect sex lives to media representation of relationships and sex. Outside of my hyperfixations, I’m an artist. I write in my free time, with my favorite genres to write being poetry and creative nonfiction. I draw, embroider, sew, make zines, and design pins. I also enjoy getting creative with my outfits and makeup when I’m not trying to pass more masc. On more lazy days, I enjoy reading manga or some nonfiction books (especially around my special interests, or any identities I belong to). I recently got into reading poetry books. I also will watch anime or movies. I tend to enjoy thriller genres more than anything else.
My favourite album is: Portals (Deluxe) by Melanie Martinez.
Something that really annoys me is: Unsolicited advice.
My last meal would be: Homemade blueberry buckle, a glass of pomegranate juice, and some strawberry and cookies-and-cream ice cream mochi.
If you want to win my heart you must: Gift me manga.
A social cause I care about is: Decolonization and Anti-Amatonormativity
Want to meet Logan Escort Hue Belladonna in person?
Head over to his profile! 👇👇👇
