Welcome back to our sex worker interview series, 'A Tryst With...' In this instalment we are joined by Bangkok Dominatrix Eva Oh to chat about high protocol, podcasts, and mentorship.
You’ve been a professional dominatrix for over 14 years. Can you tell us a little about how you came to the profession and how your career has evolved since you began?
I had no idea what domination was when I started. I had been told that I would make a good Dominatrix because of the way that I communicated as an assertive woman. I was told this jokingly, but after I had finished my probation period in strategic consulting with an agency, I realised that I did not want to be corporate anymore. I searched the word ‘domination’ and found a dungeon to train in in Sydney, Australia, where sex work is decriminalised. That’s where it began. Now, I no longer work in a dungeon doing up to eight sessions a day. I only see one or two clients a week. I do a wider range of things these days: I have a big Onlyfans presence, I’ve just finished a book, and I have a podcast.I didn’t plan any of this, it has just been me responding to opportunities and to the climate of sex workers speaking for themselves.
You trained at Sydney’s infamous Salon Kittys. What was it like undertaking a classical apprenticeship in a commercial dungeon, and how does your training differ from training methods now, where apprenticeships can be hard to come by?
I did train at the infamous Salon Kittys, thanks for knowing! I feel really sad for folks that can’t have that kind of experience. It was very difficult because other workers don’t necessarily take to you. There’s a high turnover, so I kind of get it. You can also be seen as competition under a capitalist system. In the dungeon I got access to so much gear, I could hear all of the stories–-not only stories of clients, of sessions, but of what the job was like and how it felt and how it affected people’s lives, and that was very, very valuable to me. You had to kind of hustle your way into sessions, be nice, and ask to shadow people. And all of these clients would come in off of the street! So you’d have people to work with every day, getting a lot of information and access. It was such an incredible opportunity, really, and I think that being able to get that much experience and that much knowledge of the job and the industry was so helpful.
You have a mentor Patreon. What prompted you to start this, and what are the most rewarding/demanding parts of being a mentor?
I started this, like anything, because people had been asking how I have done my job for so many years. At first I wrote a guide, but it got outdated very quickly. People had been asking me to do a course but I felt that the Q & A format of the Patreon suited me best. I also have a Discord chat that has actually become an incredible resource; the community helps each other quite a lot in there. It’s not demanding to me. I think that I manage it quite well. I don’t know if I would want to do anything bigger than what I’m doing right now; maybe I will in time, creating a course or something like that, but it’s rewarding as it is. I think it’s necessary for the way that my brain is formatted. I'm at a peak of how well I’m doing, and it feels wrong to not share that, especially considering how difficult it is to be a sex worker. It just feels like I would rather other people not go through the shit that I had to as much as possible.
Your kink practice is high protocol. Can you tell us about this and why you’ve chosen to work in this way?
I didn’t necessarily choose; it’s just the way that I prefer things to be. I can have some flexibility if people have the right personality. I gravitate towards certain personalities that really hold me in high esteem, respect my space and me, and seek my leadership, and so I don’t function well without protocol. It looks like high protocol, but it’s just the basic way that people should be around me.
Ritual is an important part of your practice. How do rituals influence your sessions?
I would say that it definitely comes across ritualistically because of how much focus and intensity and how much of myself is within the practise and the session. I approach life with great presence and great focus that makes it seem very ritualistic. I also appreciate the container that is a session and I treat it as this beautiful object.
You recently wrapped up your podcast Teakink. How did the podcast come about, what were some highlights, and why did you decide to stop producing it?
A lot of people were using the podcast word on me, and I thought okay, let’s try this out. I felt a little bit like I was in a creative stranglehold because I had signed a couple of contracts for TV development, and they said I couldn’t do this, I couldn’t do that, but they didn’t say I couldn’t do a podcast. I decided to try that out and it felt satisfying in a similar way that I like to contribute to the narrative.
I didn’t really understand how much it would resonate with people. I get stopped absolutely everywhere in the world, it doesn’t matter where I go, if I’m in a nightclub in Berlin, if I’m on a street in Bangkok, somebody is like, oh you!
The podcast has really helped me. I always like to do market research, I always ask the fans who approach me how the podcast has touched them. Sometimes it’s as simple as seeing a representation of somebody who is embodying themselves and unafraid, and other times it’s very specific, like, oh I heard my story in yours. I didn't expect that. I thought it would be an example of a sex worker's story–but that people can see their circumstance in my stories and that my thoughts and decisions on my life have helped them to take action in theirs. It's amazing! So, I think it’s just been another way for me to connect with people without expending too much energy, because I can be quite introverted. I get to share my story, and there’s a distance, and it’s a really beautiful offering that I have been able to give.
Why did I stop producing it? I thought that I had reached the end of doing it on my own, or in such an unprofessional fashion. It’s just me and my phone and no producer, no editor. I never edited a single episode. I put the intro and the outro in. So I thought, okay, maybe I could level it up. I’m taking this time to see whether I could do that, and what a new format, or formats, could look like. I’m giving it some space for evolution.
You’ve worked internationally. What is your favourite city to work in? What is your favourite city to live in?
I would say that spaces in Asia are probably close to my heart because culturally it’s the basis of where I originally come from. So it’s easy for me to have my little breaks and go to that little lunch spot I know and speak in a language that I’m at home in, you know? I would say that Asia does have a special space in helping me be grounded when I have to dedicate myself fully to work. That said, I would say that London has been very profitable and the kink scene here and the sex worker scene here is immense. It’s very enlivening to be around. But to live in London is punishing. I’m moving back to Asia. We’ll see how it all lands, but there’s never an end goal. I’ve moved around since I was born, so the world is one space for me.
How do you deal with the emotional and physiological highs and lows of domination? What kinds of aftercare do you provide to yourself?
I give myself a lot of space, so I understand that I can maybe really only do one social thing a day. I really want to enjoy my sessions, so I know that if I did one every three days it would be too close together. I thankfully have the luxury of choosing how many sessions I do these days, and so I know how to create a lot of space for myself. I think that’s probably the number one thing when it comes to aftercare, or care in general. It’s been a learning process for sure. Because I have been doing it for so long, I can jump into the headspace very easily and I can jump out of it very easily as long as I’m giving myself that care. Doing exercise, eating well and sleeping well, not doing too many social commitments, and doing creative things aside from the sessions (which I also see as a creative process) keep my mind engaged and growing. It’s like a symphony that I’m constantly managing and creating, and I think I’m in a good space at the moment.
Do you have a favourite representation of professional BDSM in tv/film?
Mine, everybody should watch my films! I have three with Erika Lust and I have one coming out in the new year that I have produced independently.
What are you passionate about outside of kink?
I would say justice. I think that being a sex worker has really made me understand the injustice of the systems that surround us and oppress us. The other wonderful workers around me have taught me how to interact with that understanding also. I think that pulling up on fairness in my day to day is a great joy of mine. Doing things like the podcast, creating more room and space and dialogue and narrative for us is adjacent—everything is connected for me. On top of that, I really do love being able to run off–I have a property in the middle of nowhere in Bali to just be with the jungle and I have another one on the edge of the bush in Australia where there’s dolphins and kangaroos. Being able to touch into those spaces and to remember that I am such a tiny facet is also very important for me.
My favorite fetishwear brand is: I cannot say because there are so many sponsoring me right now, who knew that we would become influencers? Somebody who has never paid me, but who I will always support because I think that she has some of the best latex cuts in the world,, is Lady Lucy. I think I’ll go with that to stay away from certain conflicts of interest.
The music I love to session to is: I do tailor things depending on what I know people have reacted to before. I will never have male voices, I will sometimes do female voices and I also sometimes will have full mixes that I have done that are gapless, like 2 hours. It’s very hypnotic, leaning somewhat electronic, somewhat classical. I have an aftercare playlist on Spotify that I share on my link tree that quite a few people subscribe to.
We'll get along if: You are present and perceptive.
One kink tip I think everyone should know is: That you need to understand yourself before you even enter a negotiation, to the best of your ability. I think there’s a lot of things that people gravitate towards because they want to get off, but it’s actually much more rewarding if people understand that it’s an internal process and that they need to take some time taking responsibility for their desires before they step into space with someone else. Even if it’s submission, they still need to have that responsibility.
My favorite everyday pleasure is: waking up whenever I bloody want.
Want to meet Bangkok Dominatrix Eva Oh in person?
Head over to her profile! 👇👇👇
Are you a sex worker? Do you advertise on Tryst.link? We'd love to interview you!
Our interview series' aim to highlight the wonderful providers who use our site. You can share your experiences in our A Tryst With... series on the Tryst.link blog, or let clients know just how you like it in our A Tryst About Town... series on the Good Client Guide.
Submit your interest through our online portal! 👇☂️✨
