Sometimes it feels like that everyone at the strip club is entitled to share their unsolicited opinions about us with us. They all have the audacity to critique how strippers dance, work and perform on stage, as if we owe them anything. People coming into the strip club are so obsessed with our skill level. As if it’s not already enough that half-naked, goddess-looking workers are entertaining you the whole night with great company, lots of fun, and a listening ear.
Too often we get compared to each other by customers and management, without acknowledging how unique every single stripper is. Comparing strong and beautiful individuals who are finding the energy to go to work night after night without knowing if they’re going to make actual money, if their lives will be in danger, and how the shift will turn out isn’t a flex; it’s miserable. When I first started stripping these comments got to me and they put me under a lot of pressure.
Although I was already working for years as a sex worker, the harsh tone and the aggressive treatment in many clubs I worked at left me speechless way too often. Going up on the stage was connected with insecurity, and the stage time felt like ages. I was nervous, intimidated by other dancers and the management, as well as scared what people would think about my dancing. Little did I know that I didn’t have to be that one dancer going up the pole with crazy tricks to make cash, at least not in the clubs and countries that I worked in.
Little did I know that I didn’t have to be that one dancer going up the pole with crazy tricks to make cash...
I tried so hard to show off and impress, not because I wanted to, but because I felt like I needed to be an amazing dancer in order to be a good stripper. Did it help to make more money? No, it didn’t. I rarely made big money from stage shows. The fact that in European clubs it’s common to entertain clients with stage shows the whole night for no or little money wasn’t helpful either. Instead of focusing our energy to hustle clients who will actually spend money, these clubs make sure to burn you out within weeks. At some point I decided not to destroy my body anymore and I became one of these slow dancers I always loved to watch.
Sadly, clients are not the only ones with strong opinions on how we do our job. I have seen pole dancers coming into the club, trying to be strippers, and they often fail hard. They come, look down on us, and get upset that they don’t make money while a stripper who doesn’t have the same pole skills is earning well. Welcome to the reality that being a stripper is not as easy as you might have thought.
Just because you’re good at pole doesn’t mean you’re going to be successful in the club. Stripping involves so much more than just dancing. What you need to have is a stage presence, you need to know how to flirt and how to communicate, you need to have a good intuition and thick skin, and most importantly: you need to have sales skills. Coming into our workplace and putting down other workers because you think you can do it better as a civilian pole dancer is nothing but whorephobia.
I have seen pole dancers coming into the club, trying to be strippers, and they often fail hard.
Go and take off our heels and stop using our aesthetics if you can’t respect us and our job. While we’re still fighting for basic human rights, you’re out there judging us. Most of us suffer from bad working conditions and the daily struggle to make an income. We don’t need your whorephobic comments on top of that. Working in the club is not a hobby for us, nor a space for personal pleasure, gratification or excitement. We’re not here because it’s trendy right now. We go to work to make money to pay our bills, to feed our kids, to survive in a capitalist system. Sorry to break it to you, but this job is not only about pretty outfits and having bags full of money.
To shame strippers for their dancing skills is not only shady as fuck, it’s also highly problematic. We all work long-ass hours fully glammed in 8inch heels until late in the morning and yes, we do get tired and exhausted too. After working several nights in a row at the club, I don’t want to touch a pole anymore. I need at least one day off from everything to come back to life, sometimes even more. Being around people who I don’t know, always presenting a good vibe, and entertaining no matter how I really feel in a noisy and stressful work environment is tough.
Going to pole classes on a regular basis is very expensive and not affordable for everyone. And let’s not forget that people have different physiques. Not everyone is super flexible and has the same athleticism. Pole classes are time consuming and physical and mental strength is needed to be able to go to one. Please think twice before ya‘ll walk into our workplaces and reflect on your behavior and the words you find for us. Stripping is so much more than just pole tricks.
For more from the blog on pole dancing vs stripping, see How To Be A SW Ally When You Do Pole Fit and Polefit and Sex Work.
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